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Hoosier United Methodist News Archives
| Hoosier United Methodist News |
October 2001 |
No one asked me, but …
The Prayer of Jezebel
By Bill Schwein
Impressed with the phenomenal popularity of the little book, The Prayer of Jabez, I began looking for other overlooked passages from the Old Testament that I might turn into a best seller. I felt blessed when I was able to find another prayer, buried in I Kings. I'm going to call my book The Prayer of Jezebel.
Jezebel was a Phoenician princess, the daughter, wife, mother and grandmother of kings. So far, a wonderful role model for women today. But, no! Look her up in the dictionary: "Jezebel -- any shameless, wicked woman." Jezebel became the symbol of false prophets in Revelation 2:20, probably because she brought some pretty cruel customs with her when she came to Israel, taken as a wife by Israel's evil king, Ahab. She routinely invited 850 prophets of Baal (bad guys) to her table. She was high-handed, domineering, doing anything to get her way. The Bible also says she painted her eyes and adorned her head, but I won't go there; I have a lot of friends who do that. Some are even women clergy. She was so infuriated when Elijah embarrassed and then exterminated her priests of Baal in that contest on Mount Carmel, she ordered the annihilation of the prophets (good guys), including Elijah.
He, in turn, predicted that she would suffer a horrible death. She was eventually thrown down from the palace tower, and the dogs ate her flesh. I'll spare you all the gory details, but you can read them in the ninth chapter of II Kings.
Anyway, here's her prayer: "Ahab told Jezebel all that Elijah had done, and how he had killed all the prophets with the sword. Then Jezebel sent a messenger to Elijah, saying, 'So may the gods do to me, and more also, if I do not make your life like the life of one of them by this time tomorrow.' Then he was afraid; he got up and fled for his life." I Kings 19:1-3
That kind of prayer is uttered often during fits of road rage. But I think a lot of folks, even in our churches, must also be praying that prayer. They are pushy and powerful. They instill fear and influence others to do wrong. They are formidable adversaries of those who try to do right. They want revenge, to get back, to make others pay for their mistakes. They operate by the Not-so-Golden Rule, "Do one to others if they do one to you." They vow to make someone else's life miserable. Life becomes one long competition. They look for win-lose outcomes. They become upset when someone sits in their pew, when the pastor doesn't speak to them before worship, when they don't get their way when votes are cast, or when they feel like someone is taking control over "their" congregation.
A lot of modern-day Elijahs are fleeing for their lives, or at least asking the Bishop White to move them. And their pursuers aren't all Jezebels; some of them are Jeds.
I wrote this during the terrorist attacks on New York City and Washington, D. C. I kept hearing the same word over and over. It was "retaliate." Maybe there's no need for my book after all.
The Rev. Bill Schwein is superintendent of the Indianapolis East District; his sermons are … legendary.
Last updated on 01/14/2004