'Let the children come to me' isn't permission to start a children's chat

If we are encouraged to applaud in worship these days, is it okay to boo? I've been tempted to do that after listening to some children's sermons.

Who came up with them in the first place? Does it go back to the time Jesus said, "Let the children come to me"? Granted, he often made object lessons out of seeds, lilies, camel's eyes, birds and coins -- but weren't they used with adults, not a bunch of disinterested kids sitting at his feet? Did John Wesley have a "children's chat" before he preached to the mobs and miners? Has the television camera ever shown Robert Schuller or Charles Stanley holding up a stuffed animal, surrounded by little children climbing over the communion rail?

Maybe we include them for the same reason restaurants offer children's menus with reduced portions of adult meals. Or perhaps, it's because we like the unpredictability of what the children say (often totally unrelated to the subject at hand), in contrast to how bored we've become with the redundant routine of the rest of the service.

If you feel you have to include a "sermonette" each Sunday, you might try "stump the preacher." Have kids bring items to put it in a bag. Each week, reach in, pull out an object and attempt to get a lesson out of it. Here are some biblical suggestions to help you with the things your children might bring:

An old girdle -- Job 38:3, "Gird up your loins like a man." If it is laughter you're after, and you're a male, try putting on the girdle.
A three-leaf clover -- Matthew 28:19, "In the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit." Turn it into a lesson about the Trinity. I don't know what you could say about a "four-leaf" clover.
A worn-out, favorite blanket -- Refer to Jesus' promise in John 14:16, "I will pray the Father, and he shall give you another Comforter."
A Harry Potter book -- Isaiah 64:8, "We are the clay, and you are our potter."
Deodorant -- Leviticus 2:9, how offerings made a "pleasing odor to the Lord."
An airline air sickness bag -- Job 20:15, how wicked people "swallow down riches and vomit them up again."
Boxing gloves -- Psalm 3:7, a prayer that God will "strike all my enemies on the cheek" and "break the teeth of the wicked."
Dead butterfly -- Job 4:19, he talks about wicked people who "are crushed like a moth."
Boom box -- Ezekiel 26:13, "I will silence the music of your songs."
Road map -- Exodus 13:18, "God led the people by the roundabout way." Children can then tell about the time their dad got lost on a vacation.
A diaper -- I Corinthians 15:51, "We will all be changed, in a moment."

If none of that works, you can always fill the bag with beer cans, cigarettes and lottery tickets and talk to the children about sin.

The Rev. Bill Schwein is a member of the South Indiana Cabinet and superintendent of Indianapolis East District.

Last updated on 01/14/2004

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